Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Global Warming? No worries, put that AC on.

The best quality in all mortals is HOPE. We all live and survive on hope against hope. Even if the future is dark as Black Hole, hope to see the end of tunnel keeps us going through the day.

One need not be a rocket scientist or possess super telescope to see what lies in store for this little planet. A holocaust is overdue but this time there will be no losers in the end. And this very fact and fear, recognised and shared by all, is leasing life to mankind. Nature is asking for sacrifice and all of us are looking at each other for the scapegoat.

Some politicians are having holiday in Bali these days and enjoying global warmth in winter months. Blame game and carbon trading are some of the popular themes at the meet. They all share concern over future but the common mood is to celebrate for now as they sing in chorus, "Hey Baby, Jee lene de is pal ko. Kal ki sochenge kal ko." (Let us live this moment. 'll think about future tomorrow.)

Guys, our runaway train, firing full cylinders, is approaching a dead end. Tie your seat belts and bend down forward, head on knees and hands on head in hope against hope to survive this final impact. Happy landing.

Monday, October 01, 2007

Let it go down the drain

We win the twenty-twenty matka(game of chance) and a billion odd asses think the world is there to kiss them. We made a big halla-gulla as if we had conquered heaven. Indra, the rain god, was the first to retaliate and make us realize our worth. Few hours of his tantrums last Friday and the constipated city sewage system puked. Dead of this ghost city had to endure hours of stinking ordeal on their way back to their respective graves(homes).
Sewage and drainage system is the foundation of the urban planning. The Indus Valley Civilization boasted the earliest known accounts of urban planning, and the ancient Indus systems of sewage and drainage that were developed and used in cities throughout the Indus Valley were far more advanced than that of contemporary urban sites in the Middle East. Probably due to excessive rain, it was imperative to have an effective system in place.
Having a head start from rest of the world, we have not only lost the advantage but today we are pushed into the most sub-human era of all times. Greedy builders are busy going vertical while lethargic and corrupt town planners are in a stupor. Existing storm valves and pipes are choked with plastic and rubber, unable to see off this higher and heavier than ever shitfall.
Today we boast ourselves as one of the fastest growing economy. Money is flowing here as never before and we see this money twinkling through a slummed and rotten canvas where, air, water and earth present ample opportunity for man to display his survival instinct.
What did you hear? Survival? Ghosts need not worry in this haunted township.

Monday, August 27, 2007

Disposable Culture

Great poet Rahim was the pioneer of the disposable culture way back in 16th century, when he wrote:

Rahiman dhaga prem ka, mat todo chatkai
Toote se phir na jude, jude gaanth pad jaye

But it took three centuries to find solution to that knot. King Camp Gillette, taking a cue from the crown cork (used in place of lost caps of bottle refills), designed the first disposable - a razor blade. We have come a long way since then. Today almost everything is disposable, from nappy to relationship.

Other day my 7 year old demanded a new pair of shoes. I enquired sheepishly, "Why, What happened? I just bought you a pair last month." He declared that the lace of one of the pair was broken. If I were in his place, I would have simply knotted the broken lace but for him I bought a new one, lace ofcourse.

Endless assembly lines roll out objects of desire day in and day out. The economy of scale and time has made it cheaper to buy a new piece rather than repairing the broken one. While some repairs are certainly beyond the realms of the ordinary consumer, many are incredibly simple, requiring just the replacement of a broken or worn-out part. But it is a time consuming task to find spares and menders, incase you can't handle it yourself.

Mending is a dead art. The Mochi sitting at our colony gate, has a visiting card and calls the spot 'Jug's Shoe Saloon'. He only polishes shoes and does no repair work. However, he does undertake (soul) changes.

Abiding by the use and throw policy, we are producing piles of waste and pollutants. Besides, we are putting a lot of pressure on natural resources. On the positive side, disposable culture has given a push to economy and technology. Energy required for mending broken stuff goes into making new things.

But I like to make things work. For the past five years, I have spent number of weekends repairing my son's old bicycle in order to keep it running. But seems my son has now run out of patience and I'll have to buy him a Firefox soon to make this relationship work.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Citius, Altius, Fortius

Half an earth, half an earth,
Half an earth onward,
All in the valley of Mao
Rode the 1.3 billion.

Their's not to make reply,
Their's not to reason why,
Their's but to do and die:
When can their glory fade?

O the wall they made!
All the world wondered.
Honour the rail road they made,
Noble 1.3 billion.

- with apology to Alfred Tennyson.

For China, Olympics 2008 is not just another leap year games, but an exercise to showcase China in front of the world.

China has employed and trained 32,000 to 35,000 people across China, some of them farmers, who are paid $100 a month to handle anti-aircraft guns and rocket launchers. They are not at war with anyone but the Chinese government believes launching shells containing silver iodide pellets, using more than 12,000 anti-aircraft guns and rocket launchers in addition to about 30 planes, into clouds will curb rainfall and clear smog, ensuring clear skies for the 2008 Summer Olympics opening ceremonies in Beijing, when the sky go abuzz with fireworks.

Known as cloud seeding, China is counting on its "Light Brigade" of farmers-turned-weather-gods to maintain favourable weather through out the games.

On the other hand, China has started building a new fenced road to Everest Base Camp to ease access for the planned Olympic torch relay over the summit of the world's highest peak next year. The road through China's Tibet region will be used as the main route for the Olympic torch relay to the 5,200-metre Base Camp and for the increasing number of tourists visiting the mountain. From there a special high-altitude torch will carry the Olympic flame to the 8,844-metre summit of Everest.

China will move plenty of earth in bid to make 2008 games, a display of people's power, a grand success.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

World Population Day

On this day, my respectful tribute to 13 billion hands, writing destiny of our planet.

Rubber, copper, scalpel or pills; all have failed to stop those intruding motile tailed 007s, from passing on the secrete code to the oval headquarters and conspiracy against mankind being hatched.

On the other hand, technology is up in arms against the theory of survival of the fittest, denying and defying rightful elimination of natural waste.

Thanks to the ball and brain, we have multiplied in numbers and grown from strength to strength. So far so good. Only fear and inevitable is the day, these numbers would stand up and use their might against each other.

Can only wish many many more happy returns of the day. Long live population.

Monday, July 02, 2007

Another one bites the dust

Another one bites the dust
And another one gone, and another one gone
Another one bites the dust
Hey, we gonna get you too
Another one bites the dust


Pack o wolves is on the run on a lifeless snow expanse. One falls, others devour. Iraquda and Syriappa were really meaty. The two have replenished the whole of :-) remaining hungry pack. The gradually diminishing pack is celebrating a night of content and prosperity. It would be "One World" till another one bites the dust.

Long live One Earth! and brotherhood!!! Wait till the meat turns dust in your jaws.

Carry on Earth...

Friday, May 18, 2007

Lifetime of a Universe

Creation of Universe
A big bang boom!!! And lo! Time, Space, Matter and Antimatter were born.

Matter and antimatter were both produced in equal quantities. Both started destroying each other on contact. But at the same time there was alignment and partition of the two. Matter joined hands together and formed a ring, and on the other side antimatter joined hands together to form another ring and both rings started inflating like a balloon in different planes.

Two identical intersecting rings of matter and antimatter are expanding clear of each other. Bound by gravity, hand in hand, celestial bodies are on their outward journey to eternity, so it seems.

End of Universe
Something created, must climax and end. Our world is destined to end abruptly at climax.

At some point in time the two balloons would be overstretched and gravity would not be able to hold matter or antimatter together thus breaking the links in the ever expanding rings, which in turn would bring the entire mass crashing down the centre breaching the other intersecting ring at the same time and the entire matter and antimatter would be annihilated, leaving a timeless canvas of energy behind.

Friday, May 04, 2007

My Universe

Light or energy was always there and will always be there...

I would describe light/energy in terms of time as "A unique frame where nothing changes or zero time or just an instance." Speed is function of time and space. But time, space and matter cease to exist in the frame of light.

Therefore, Speed of light = distance/time = 0/ 0 = undefined

Light/energy is not what we see.

Energy is something which has zero inertia or infinite inertia, cause inertia is again a function of time.

Creation of universe
At an instance, energy mated with anti energy - A big bang boom!!! And lo! Time, Matter and space were born.

Matter is stubborn baby of energy. Matter is limited by time and space. It was created and shall end with time and space. Matter is well conserved within time domain. It only changes form.

Time is matter's nanny/governess or master also adds to its dimensions. Time is mono directional and Cyclical in nature.

Provides dimensions and body to the matter. Makes movement possible. We see and perceive a three dimensional space. There could be more strings attached.

Other Dimensions
There are other dimensions too, specially matter specific, which we can not see or observe.

End of Universe
Probably the day anti matter meets and screw matter. Big bang Zoom!!! All would vanish into thin air.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Hum sab ek hein!!!

On my way to the Ministry of Transport, I pass by UNI building everyday. The BOD of UNI has been trying to sell off a major stake of the news agency to Zee Telefilms. Employees of UNI are protesting its sell off. For past few months a small group of employees gather outside the building and raise slogans against the management on a loudspeaker.

The other day while passing, I overheard an argument between the protestors. They were markedly divided over the change of location of the protest podium to the shaded side of the gate as some still preferred vastness of their regular side over the new venue where a tree shielded them from merciless midday sun. I heard the heated exchange till their noises faded away in the distance. But just then I couldn't stop laughing at them as I heard loudspeaker come to life with, "Hum sab ek Hein! UNI hamara hai!" (We all are one!!!)

Global Warming - A Meagre Solution


A well written article.

But the writer has failed to shave off the root of the problem. East foots the bill for West's luxury but who will foot the bill for East's extravagance. Solution does not lie in alternate fuels. Adding any kind of fuel to the existing wheel wagon is gonna derail the nature in coming years.

We need to cut down on fire in our minds, belly and below belly. Only hope for mankind lies in de-commercialization of society. We must learn to enjoy this beautiful planet as it is. We don’t need no gaudy seasoning, decoration or presentation to this Godly platter(planet). Lingerie and g-strings are enough to add flavour to sexy bodies. Today, beauty is dead and buried deep down the garbage of human civilization.

We grow up learning about personal hygiene, we wash our hands ten times, boil our water and food but what about the air we breathe? We are blissfully inhaling the most un-hygienic thing on our planet.

Carry on earth…

Saturday, March 10, 2007


Welcome to the Caribbean calypso. Above is my wild go to the top. Wish you all a Happy World Cup 2007 and late nite viewing. Thieves and burglers are sure to go through a lean period. My advice to them, " Have a break guys. Sit back and enjoy."

Saturday, March 03, 2007

J Man's Vision

Recently I had the pleasure of going thru a beautifully writen blog.

The young writer is none other than my sister's son Amit alias Jugga (extreme left).

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Making Of A Picture

The man on right was wandering aimlessly when he saw a settee in the green frame. Think he was sort of tired and wanted to rest for a while, so he stepped inside and sat in the middle with both legs up. Before he could regain his full composure, the woman on left pushed him aside and acquired most of the settee. The tussle between the two was on for the possession of larger share. In this ado, the boy in middle gave them a sweet surprise and secured his place with a cry. While fine adjustments were in progress, they all were surprised by yet another visitor, who also became a part of this picture. Finally, they all found their butt place within the limits of the green frame. But life is to change. After few years, flankers will make way for new entries and so the picture will keep changing with time...

Friday, February 02, 2007


Six months back, I noticed termites at my bathroom door sill. I ignored them as I was planning a complete renovation in a years time and left the entire vastness of the sill to their disposal. The small, fragile but relentlessly hardworking creature, soon started building a colony in the heart of hard wood sill. Thousands of worker termites built a palace for the queen and a housing scheme for Queen's offspring was under construction. Day in and day out, the creepy creature was busy implementing the architectural marvel for a comfortable living for the society as whole. A civilization was underway...

Away from the vagaries of nature and in the lap of luxury, my little friends started growing in numbers quickly.

In Rakesh Roshan style computer, I started capturing and deciphering sounds emanating from this enigmatic world of growing activity and prosperity as follows:

at the end of 1st month
Queen Ant: "My dear sisters, At the end of current term I wud like to congratulate you for having done a good job. During this period we have recorded a growth of 500% in terms of population, 700% in terms of area and our GDP has gone up by 1000%. But we have to do better in order to make our world stronger, more beautiful and comfortable. I am going to set higher targets for the next term, lets hit the bull's eye."

at the end of 2nd month
Queen Ant: "My dear sisters, At the end of current term I wud like to congratulate you for having done a great job. During this period we have recorded a growth of 1000% in terms of population, 1500% in terms of area and our GDP has gone up by 2000%. Also, our mortality rate has dropped from 30% to 15%. But we have to do better in order to make our world more beautiful and comfortable. I am going to set higher targets for the next term, lets hit the bull's eye."

And so on...

...Blissfully oblivious of their ever diminishing resources, the termites kept working harder and kept eating and growing faster, till one day, I found a heap of dust below where the door sill used to stand once. A solitary cockroach was devouring the remains of a thriving civilization, which were now laying on the ground just few breaths away from history. I took out an anti termite spray from my tool bag and cut short the agony of dying termites. Mercy killing is a civilized act, so I believe...